(Written for LeetGamersBlog)

A lot of people are instantly put off playing games online by the ridiculously steep learning curve that most of them have. I mean, we can’t all be obnoxious, cyborg 14 year olds who know every map and level of their favourite game like the back of their pale, chubby hands, can we?

In order to level the playing field (a bit) I’ve compiled a list of easy-to-use tips for the “working man”, the guy on the street, the dude in the car, the fella in the pub, the chap in the brothel, etc.

Most of them will seem pretty obvious at first, but you’ll be surprised at how effective they are.

SLOW DOWN!

Sprinting everywhere like a child may be fun at first, but just like a hyperactive kid running through the playground it’ll only end in tears and grazed knees. Tears and grazed knees in this case being a metaphor for bullet-ridden lungs and a missing leg thanks to that claymore you just stepped on. Nice one Rambo!

Casually walking everywhere is a better alternative that will increase your accuracy and decrease the time it takes to look down the sights. That being said, it’s still acceptable to sprint through open spaces as long as you know the path ahead of you is clear.

 

Learn to count.

One advantage you have as a virtual soldier over your real-life counterparts is the handy HUD that displays everything you need to know. (unless you’re playing hardcore rules, of course. But then if you are you’re far too cool and probably won’t be reading this…)

Use the ammo count to judge whether or not you need to reload. I’m a hypocrite here as I tend to fall into the trap of reloading after EVERY minor skirmish, often when I don’t need to. Try and reload only when you’ve found sufficient cover.

Boot Camp.

The best way to learn the maps and which weapons/classes you like is Combat Training. Set the bots to the easiest difficulty and it’s just like playing online, but in super slow motion and no 12 year olds with ADHD screaming into your mature, hairy, man-ears. 

 To make it a bit less boring, invite a friend or two in to help you slaughter the mindless goons. Just don’t spend too long training as you’ll get used to the AI and it won’t prepare you for the spontaneity of online matches. If I’m feeling a bit rusty I sometimes jump into combat training before a session, for like 10-15 minutes. You know, just to find my BLOPS legs and centre my chi.

Erm… Don’t die.

I told you they may seem obvious, but what I mean is don’t throw your lives away like there’s no tomorrow. Sure, you respawn and get another chance, not like in stupid real life where you die and THAT’S IT, game over! But what about the rest of your team?

 Clearly this doesn’t apply to free-for-all games but it does for all the team games and Team Deathmatch in particular. There’s no shame in hiding behind that rock just one second longer. Bide your time and be patient, friend.

 

He who fails to plan, plans to fail.

Always have a strategy and a specific class for every situation. Some are more obvious than others, for example in Capture the Flag you’ll want a speedy class with lightweight and marathon pro if you plan on being on the offensive or if you are planting/defusing bombs then a flak jacket is a must. The flak jacket happens to be one of my favourite perks for most matches as it greatly eliminates the chance of getting killed by random grenades and explosions.

You also need to be ready to adapt at any given moment and switch classes between deaths. Is the enemy constantly calling in spy planes? Switch to a “ghost” class and catch them off guard. Have they called in a chopper gunner? Go grab your Strela missile launcher and blast that bird out of the sky! It’s also worth noting the class types of the rest of your team and coordinating with them so that you have an evenly balanced team that’s ready for anything. Which brings me on to my next point….

There’s no “I” in team. But there is in “idiot”. In fact there are two…

Teamwork may not be well catered for in the Call of Duty games as every class type is quite well-rounded and can pretty much manage without any need for a “medic” or “engineer” class, but that doesn’t mean you can’t all pull together and get the job done! Communication is the key here and even though it’s a damn sight easier to bark orders at your friends than it is a complete stranger you should still make the effort to join in with the team talk.

 If there isn’t anyone talking at first then you simply take charge and goad them out of their shy little shells. Failing that, you can still act as a team player in complete silence by covering team mates and stalking them around the map, watching their back as you go. You’ll be pleasantly surprised at how well a bunch of mute and dumb misfits can organise themselves into a platoon of cold-blooded, calculated killers.

Level Up!

Do some research into which classes have the best Pro perks and which ones you’re best with, then try your best to quickly level up those perks one at a time. Complete contracts and keep switching weapons in order to maximise your XP gains.

Camp!

Controversial, I know, because everyone hates a camper. But if you’re having a particularly bad game then there’s no shame in sitting in a bush and crying for a bit. It stops you getting killed and costing your team points. It also gives you time to take a breather and maybe get some easy kills.  There are certain maps that are better for this than others and I’m not ashamed to admit that I’ve found one sweet spot that I always go to on a particular map.

 That said, you always get found out sooner or later and you shouldn’t really return to it because it’ll just make you a bigger target. People love smoking out a camper from their hiding place and trust me, once they sniff your blood they’ll stop at nothing to move you.

 

Stick and Move, Stick and Move!

This is more general advice than a tip really, but it’s the style I like to adopt and have seen many other successful players use as well. First of all, make sure you stick to the edges of the map when possible, keeping your back to the edge as much as you can. This eradicates the possibility of being attacked from behind and allows you to focus on what’s in front of you.

As you make your way around the map you should also camp in a spot and wait for around 30 seconds. If nothing happens, move on and repeat until you find some action. Obviously you can judge by your map and team-talk where the heavy shit is going down, so aim to make your way to the hot zone, but don’t just charge in using the obvious routes.

If you do camp and manage to get a kill or two then don’t linger around, just keep moving and repeat. It helps if you know all the maps fairly well and if you’ve used the tips above you should be familiar with them from combat training. Basically this is an advanced form of camping, but you’re not as likely to get shit for it and it’s arguably more effective than just staying in one spot.

I hope these tips help keep you alive for at least a little bit longer and I hope to see you on the battlefield!

Over and out.